Monday, February 23, 2015

Liam's time at the Swimming Pool

This is Liam's writing on his time at the swimming pool.

Learning intention

I am learning to write a hook {an exciting beginning} that capture audience interest levels.

“Wahoo’’, as I went down the hydro slide. My tummy was going to burst in a blink of an eye and it smelled like it was going to vomit. I just bumped my head as I reached to the bottom of the slide with my brother as well. When I made it at the bottom I made a huge splash and my face was all covered with water also my whole body.

My brother says to me “ Come on Liam lets go on the water slide and I said this is fun!!!’’. I zoomed in the tunnel. It was my fun day at the swimming pools and I'll do it again next time.


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